…the more I like it.
This sounds obvious, because it is.
What is less obvious is that the enjoyment of liking something can feel like pressure, because I like it so so so much the more more more I do it.
Since actively using the Eye, I’ve almost never experienced “not having enough time.” This is largely because my mind isn’t running unless necessary. Most of the time, I am in flow state and/or I simply “don’t think.” I mean that, if I am taking a walk and there’s a red light in front of me, I will perceive the red light and stop, instead of walking straight into the traffic. But I will not need to “think” for that. This is more like a physical reaction to the redness of the light. I’ll be on autopilot. And in this case, autopilot is desirable. Flow state also feels like autopilot in that I am not “thinking.” Flow state is when things spontaneously trickle into you from the ether and/or when things spontaneously trickle out of your internal universe. (Imagine your gut containing the entire universe.)
Anyway, despite having “enough time,” what I am experiencing these days is the sense of “how do I do more of all of what I like, all the time”?
“All of” is the problem here.
I like blogging. I like podcasting. I like fiction writing. I like translating stuff for ORCABOOKS. I also like translating for a creator I like. And I have the Storyteller’s Eye now. I podcast in Korean also. I occasionally write fiction in Korean also. (One thing I did a few days ago was to fold the Korean blog into the Korean podcast’s website. So, that one’s gone now!) I even like the admin part of all this!
I want to be doing all of the above, all the time. Therefore, in other words, I would like to have the ability to do all of them at the same time.
That is not possible, in this world of linear time and fixed locations. This limitation is what creates story in this world. It’s not desirable to remove that. I know it. And still!
The most sensible advice I encountered was: do what you love the most, of all the things you love, at any given moment. Even if you like everything you do, there’s got to be some difference in your preference, depending on your mood, the weather, your location, etc. Perceive that difference. Based on that, pick what you like the most at any given moment. Do that. Forget about the rest, until you exhaust yourself, which is bound to happen. At that point, pick your next favorite activity of the moment. Whatever you don’t do on any given day was something that didn’t need to get done. Therefore, there is no need to mourn your not doing it.
Okay. Well. Yeah.
But still! What is determining the need? Why can’t I pick my needs myself?
I know the answer. What: the power that gives me flow states by giving me stuff to spontaneously trickle in or out. Why: because that’s gonna create unnecessary headaches.
So. Yeah. I am in that “still!!!!” state, sometimes, these days. Such a state doesn’t last more than 15 minutes or so at a time. But it does happen.
As I said, I folded the Korean blog into the Korean podcast. That should, theoretically, alleviate my desire to do everything all the time & all at the same time. There is one less thing to like! But it was a tiny component in the things I do. I don’t know how much of a difference it will make.
Sponge will start having shorter episodes with higher frequencies. (From 50min-ish episodes every other week to 25min-ish episodes every week.) That might help give me the sense of “it’s happening all the time.”
This blog, I like, because it’s flexible.
Meanwhile, likely, I will create a personal Instagram account for when I’m in Seoul.
Because… Remember my last trip, in May? I was in Portland/Seattle for only 10 days, and I blogged pictures from that trip for 3 months thereafter? 😅 That was ridiculous. That was a classic “belly button larger than belly” scenario. That, I don’t consider as “doing something I like, all the time.” That just took way too long. I was talking about May in August, purely because of the number of pictures!
This upcoming trip will be 3 months long. Imagine for how long I’m gonna be uploading pictures, if I were to do what I did with Portland/Seattle. 10 days turned into 3 months, back then. At that rate, 90 days would turn into 270 days. 9 months about a trip that already ended! Who wants that? Not me. Do you? Probably not!
So, Instagram with its easy uploads will be handy. (Blogging on the phone is not fun. I won’t do it.)
It also helps that, ever since Instagram added the feature to only see the accounts you follow, it’s been a breeze to use it. (I have shared accounts for some Korean projects I do.) I see 0 ads on Instagram. In fact, this feature is so great that Instagram feels better than Youtube. There is 0 spam I see on Instagram these days, except from real humans. Ya know, the humans who ask you to follow them back.
Meanwhile, blogging can still be handy. For example:
This map shows the districts of Seoul, with their names translated into English, literally.
They sound like fantasy names! I love it.
“Riversouth” is Kangnam, from the Kangnam style fame. The nearby areas is where I always stay when I visit Korea. That’s the area where my grandma on my mother’s side used to live. Grandma is no more, but I will still stay in that area.
I always tell myself that I should stay in River North, but I never do it. (Note: River north/south/west/east are, each, the names of specific districts. But River north and south are also used to describe, literally, the general area to the north of the river and the area to the south of the river.)
The reason I never do it is that, as so often happens all around the world, once you’re in a city, even a 10 minute distance feels very truly much extremely distant. Like, in LA, 20 miles is “close enough,” but after I stay in Seoul for ten days, I’m like “I can’t be bothered to cross the street.”
Seriously. I have a friend who lives in a huge apartment complex. (These are common in South Korea. Huge complexes with dozens of 20+ story buildings, and thousands of units.) In such complexes, there are multiple convenience stores. He said that he doesn’t bother to go to the one that is farther away, within his apartment complex. 😂 As in, he will deign to take the elevator and walk 1 minute to the closet convenience store, but not to the one that’s 5 minutes away. Nope. No deal. Not possible.
However, do not be concerned for the health of Seoulites. I can’t remember the last time I saw anyone obese, in that city.
I also like reading. I want to be reading all the time. 😭 I want 5,000 lifetimes. How do I do that…!